Emotional

The first day and the last day are the worst days for me. The first day I find out my friend is pregnant, and the last day when she has the baby. Both days for me involve a lot of tears. I wish they did not. I wish I could pull myself together more. Picking out a shirt that would best hide tear stains. I don't want to go to church, because I don't want people seeing me so emotional. I'll skip over make up, because I know it won't last. I'll leave my hair down, so it better hides my face. We haven't been to our own church in a couple weeks, and I miss the people there. I don't know why these emotions are so much better under control during the pregnancy and not at the beginning or end. I know today will be a tough day for Cherish, going through the labor and birth of her child. I pray all that goes smoothly and God will provide an excelent name, boy or girl. Today unfortunately looks to be a tough day for me, but in a completely different way. Pray for me? Gotta make it through it all. It's not right to cry tears of sadness when your friend has a baby, yet I feel heartbroken. I hope if anyone sees my emotionalness... That they'll somehow understand and not make a big deal out of it. *considers staying home hiding from the world*